Change of Scenery


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I remember it so well, crossing the California border headed to Texas. I had no idea what God had in store for us. All I knew was it was gonna be good…eventually. We saw so much potential and possibilities but never realized the journey ahead was for healing. We had so much toxic surrounding us. Every where we went it was there. Unhealthy relationships. Broken dreams. Messed up mind sets. Damaged trust. In Gods grace and mercy he took us to a safe place to heal. To find him, again. To find each other, again. To find ourselves, perhaps for the first time. I love our story of how God redeems everything if we let him. We must yield to his careful hands to take what’s toxic and broken and turn it into something healthy and whole. Only he can do it. Don’t resist his tugging you away. Isolation can be hard as we all have seen in recent days. He has to take you aside and silence the noise for you to hear him speak truth. Life. Healing. Into EVERY broken place. You are safe there. It will hurt, but you’ll heal. I realized after all these years that he was preparing us for the hardest journey we’d ever face. We needed to be emotionally whole to deal with the physical torment of cancer ahead. I’m so glad we said yes. I promise you’ll never regret the change of scenery that healing offers. Go my friend and be healed. ❤️

One Day at a Time


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The other day my alarm went off and panic set in. I was afraid of what the day would bring. Am I enough to handle it, whatever it is? As I laid there I felt this reassuring tug and the words “you got through Mike’s cancer, you can get through this.”

We try to tackle life all at once. We want the blue prints. The plan. And when we don’t have it we go bonkers with anxiety, stress and frustration.

As days go by and situations develop in ways we didn’t see coming we need more grace to live one day at a time. The unknowns of life. The anxiety of what needs to be done. The fear of ifs. The torment of how. Only Jesus can bring relief, peace, and help.

The enemy wants and needs you to believe that YOU have to figure it all out….today…right now. That my friends is a lie! Gods word says…So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today. {Matthew 6:34} God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble. {Psalm 46:1}

We may not have it all figured out and guess what we don’t need to. Can we be ok with that? Can we trust that Jesus has gone before us and will lead us into victory? Can we believe that his heart is for us even in all things?

My hope today is that yes, we can! We can be trusting, hopeful, and confident that we are not alone or without help. We can rest that one day at a time the Lord will equip us. Lead us. Protect us. We are in good hands friends.

Praying for y’all ❤️


Won’t He Do It Again?


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Current trials can blind us to the history we have with Jesus. If he has done it once, won’t he do it again? I was reminded again {sometimes we need a spiritual smack} of how far the Lord has brought me and what he has “already” done in my life. A moment of reflection brought me to tears as I was asked “Don’t you remember Em?” Yes Lord, I remember how many times you picked me up and mended this broken heart of mine. I remember every time you miraculously met a need. I remember the moments you divinely guided me in the right direction. I remember how you rescued me from myself. Lord, I remember.  Go back today and be reminded of all the Lord has done. Speak of it. Tell someone. Encourage yourself and others with the proof of his faithfulness. Won’t he do it again? Yes, my friends, he will!


Em ❤️

Going Higher


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I have heard it said that “God will not give us more then we can handle.” I disagree. There have been so many moments that l could not handle what I was going through. But this did not mean that God couldn’t handle it.

All throughout scripture people have cried out in desperation. Faint at heart. Crushed. Broken. Beyond their capabilities of handling their situation. Sound familiar? Their example shows me where they went…higher…to God.

In our weakness we are told to lean, put all our weight upon the Lord. He is careful to hold us through the trial. His mercy, compassion, and love shields us in ways we can’t see. The presence of trials is not the absence of Gods mercy. Today, rather than looking at my pain I will look to the one who can alleviate it. The healer. Sustainer. All faithful One. I will go higher.

Hear my cry, O God, listen to my prayer; from the end of the earth I call to you when my heart is faint. Lead me to the rock that is higher than I, for you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the enemy. – Psalm 61:1-3


Em 😊



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That’s a tough subject for many, especially when you’ve been deeply hurt. A big part of my story revolved around the wrong definition of what forgiveness meant. Questions led to fear and that fear led to beating myself up over and over again unknowingly leaving the door open to more hurt. 

What is forgiveness? 

To make a choice to pardon or release someone based on a wrong they did…that’s forgiveness. It’s doesn’t at all mean that the wrong was justified or that it never happened. Some think that to forgive is to admit that what someone did wasn’t wrong. That you, the one hurt, doesn’t have a reason to be hurt or offended. That they, the offender, is off the hook. Wrong! There are consequences, but we are not always the one to determine what those are. It is NOT a get out of jail free card for them…it’s for you. To be free from anger, resentment, bitterness, and pain. It’s a gift you give yourself. 

I was taught that just so long as they said “sorry” that was enough. Well, that’s not enough for me and I found that’s not enough for God either. He requires more, a godly sorrow that leads to repentance and a change of heart and actions. 

“For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death. Just see what this godly sorrow produced in you! Such earnestness, such concern to clear yourselves, such indignation, such alarm, such longing to see me, such zeal, and such a readiness to punish wrong. You showed that you have done everything necessary to make things right.” ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭7:10-11‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Proof is what I like to call it. How many times have you asked for forgiveness and turned around and did the same thing again? Or, someone has said sorry only to turn around and repeat their behavior? We must live by Gods standard, especially if we hold others to them. 

What isn’t forgiveness? 

Forgiveness is not shoving things under the carpet. Forgiveness is not forgetting it ever happened. That’s denial and avoidance. Doing this hides us from the truth and closing the door on our healing. Pain left unhealed blinds us to our future. We can’t move forward because we are always looking back. 

Forgiveness doesn’t have to establish a relationship. This is where so many people have it wrong. They think to forgive is to allow that someone back in your life. In some cases this will happen and relationships can be restored. Sometimes, relationships are altered and require strict boundaries, if not a temporary or permanent separation. Take abuse for example. Should someone who is being abused allow the abuser access to them just because they apologized? Or should there be boundaries that limit relationship and access until a pattern of sincerity and changed behavior is proven? 

Sadly, so many of us don’t know how to forgive and begin the process of healing because we have been misinformed. 

Forgiveness is a choice. Gods word tells us to forgive so that we can be forgiven. 

“If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭6:14-15‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Although we may never do what someone has done to us we are not perfect. We too, are human. Imperfect. It’s a process. We are a process. It took me a moment to forgive and years to walk out the process of healing. It took a moment to ask for forgiveness, but time to learn a new way. This is a process that if we can walk it out no matter the pain, we can be free, eventually.  Free from the stains we caused and free from the stains that others have left behind. 

I don’t pretend to have it all together. Many days I have to remind myself that it takes time. Being quick to forgive is hard, but freeing. Knowing that I need Gods forgiveness keeps my heart pliable to truth…Gods truth. 

I pray Gods truth would be louder than our past hurts, lies, and misunderstandings. My desire is that we can move forward and experience healing, healing that leads to freedom. Freedom that helps us set others free! 

Em ❤️ 

Heart to Heart 


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So, the other day my hubby and I were having a heart to heart. Love those with him. He is usually very quiet, so the conversationalist in me rejoices in these moments. Since the cancer diagnosis {9 months ago} a lot has changed, mostly our perspective. How we live and why. Trauma does this. It rearranges, subtracts, and adds to life. We don’t get to choose the unexpected, but we can choose how we respond to it. 

It’s easy to become cynical. Angry. Bitter. That’s the path of least resistance. Looking for the good and purpose requires more thought, time, and effort. People usually quit before they find it. Fatigue sets in. Hopelessness drains hearts. Lies steal futures and then our choices destroy us.

We make excuses for inexcusable things just because of what has happened to us. Life. Family. Struggle. We give it all to much credit for all the wrong reasons. I am guilty of glorifying the pain and the ones responsible for it. A huge part of my life was lived being hurt by those hurting from others hurting them. It’s a vicious cycle that needs to end now! 

Cancer is not an excuse, neither is abuse, rape, poverty, violence, or any other horrible thing the enemy throws at us to become one who victimizes others and ourselves with our poor choices and thoughtless actions. 

Choice. It’s a beautiful, fragile, powerful thing, yet we don’t always handle it with care. I’ve learned that not making a choice, is a choice. When we choose to sit back and do nothing with the life we’ve been given it’s a waste of the potential we have inside of us. 

You see, our life doesn’t end at the end of the struggle if we still have breath. Purpose can be born out of the struggle if we don’t grow weary and trust that God is faithful to complete what he started in us. 

This was the heart to heart we had. What are we gonna do about where we’ve been? The good. The bad. The ugly. It all matters. Can we become people who allow God to use our struggle, pain, and past to be expamples of what hope and victory look like? I pray we can.

I want to blaze a trail of hope for my children and generations to come. I want and need my life, all of it, to count. I won’t accept it was all for nothing. When God said, all things work together for the good of them who love him and are called according to his purpose, I believed him!! And now I have to partner with him to see that purpose revealed and lived out. 

No more excuses. No more causing pain because we hurt too. Enough is enough. We have lives waiting on us to be who we are meant to be. You are someone’s example, blessing, and trailblazer.  Don’t quit now! Be the someone you needed and I promise you you’ll find your purpose. 

There’s no going back to the way things were. Honestly, I don’t want it to. Why? I’ve learned what it is to be strengthened in difficulty. To rely on God with every fiber of my being. I’ve seen miracles happen. Hearts transformed. Cancer won’t become our excuse. No, it’ll be our launching pad that propels us closer to our purpose!! 

Em ❤️  

Thy Will Be Done 


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What is the will of God for you? Some of us have no idea what that is. We live by our emotions. Our situations drive us and lead us down into a ditch of despair. 

When Mike was first diagnosed with cancer I heard this song “Thy will be done” by Hillary Scott. Powerful song. As I was singing it the Lord questioned me…what is my will? Do you even know what your singing? I had to stop and think. The scripture of when Jesus was teaching the disciples to pray came to mind…thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. What is heaven like? No lack. No tears. No pain. No sickness. I had been praying…IF it be your will Lord heal Mike 😳 why do we pray that way when God tells us clearly in his word what his will is? It is his will you be healed. Be prosperous. Live in peace. We rely on our emotions and not enough on the word of God. 

We have have the power and authority as children of God to speak things that are not as though there were. Speak. Declare. Call down the promises and word of God into your situation. Believe he is able to honor his word. No more believing lies. Don’t allow doubt, fear, and unbelief to be your guide. We have something greater…Gods word to lead us into all truth!! 

What Are You Waiting For? 


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Imagine a child on the edge of a pool, ready to jump, with their father waiting with open arms to catch them. Now picture 20 minutes later and that same child is still waiting to jump. By now the father has said many times over…I’ve got you, just jump already. 

How many times has the Father told you to step out, to jump, because He’s got you? 

What would you do if you knew that you’d be ok in the end? 

I’ve been that child. Full of fear. Intimated by the water. Afraid I’ll drown. Unsure that I would be caught. We all have those fears that hinder our progress. They scream loudly and echo lies in our ears. Sadly, we believe them and have grown accustom to their voices. We no longer challenge or silence them. 

Years ago I was given a dream that I whole heartedly believed. A passion began to stir in me and I walked in the truth that I was someone with a purpose. Along the way life hit me hard. Decisions I made. Other people’s decisions. Situations that came and stayed longer than expected. All of it became more than I could bare and I caved under the weight of it all. 

I stopped believing the dream, I stopped believing I had purpose. 

Have you been there? Are you there now? Can I whisper some truths to you friend? 

That dream, passion, desire, and promise is still alive in you! How do I know? You’re still alive!! All those moments, weeks, and years you feel have been wasted have created depths in you. What the enemy meant to distract and derail you the Lord has used to your benefit. Your God has sown his truths deep in you. He’s changed you. Although you may feel numb, you have transformed through the pain and become strong, beautiful, and a force to be wreckoned with. 

So, what are you waiting for? It’s time to move closer to the edge of your destiny and put your foot in. Write that story. Go to the gym. Take a class. One step at a time and soon enough you’ll be all in. It’s not easy to overcome what holds us back, but today we need to take a step closer than we were yesterday. It’s a process. It takes time, but I have faith that with God on our side and a promise in our belly we can accomplish anything! 

It’s All Good 

When my husband Mike was first admitted in the hospital I stayed the night with him and had a dream. I dreamed that a friend was administering meds to him. This friend is a pharmacist so it didn’t seem odd. When I had parked the night before I didn’t realize I had parked in front of a cancer center named…Roger S. Good. It also happened to be the name of my friend in the dream. As I left that morning I saw the sign and wept. I knew the Lord was preparing me for the road ahead, cancer {Acute Myeloid Leukemia}, but I was to know that it would be good. How could cancer be good?! The cancer isn’t good, but the results and outcome would be. Today after a series of out of town transfusions we were transferred to a local center…Roger S. Good! We walked in and I couldn’t help but cry {still crying as I type this out} Jesus amazes me. Although we are still walking this out, today was a reminder of what he said months ago…it’s good. Lord let it be as you have said. I trust you to work this out for our good, for the good of our family, for the good of your purpose. 

I pray for my friends reading this that their current struggle is being worked out for their good. Remind them of your promise, your love, your goodness. 

Romans 8:28…And we know that all things work together for GOOD to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. 

Not This Time Around 


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Today as I was enjoying my breakfast I was confronted with a piece of my past. Why does that sting so much? Makes me just wanna crawl back in bed and stay there. Memories flooding my mind and taking me back to a place that I never wanted to visit again. A place of shame. Guilt. Regret. 

What do we do in these moments when you’re taken by surprise by your own actions? 

Run? Hide? Deny? 

I wanted to do all these things. Instead, I put my big girl chonies on and said “oh heck no, not today!” 

I was reminded that I am forgiven. That I have a choice to do things differently. What once was is no longer. I can’t go back and undo what was done but I can do what I should’ve done then, today. 

Gods mercies are new every morning and today I needed an extra dose. I got it in the form of a gentle soul who whispered grace to me. She reminded me of how far I’ve come. When all I saw was shame she saw me. She echoed the redeeming voice of God. No condemnation. No judgement. 

Couldn’t we all use that? 

Let me be that voice to you today. Let these words bring comfort to your heart. The Lord wants you to know… 

  • You are forgiven.
  • You are not defined by your failures. 
  • You can choose today, right now, to go a different way. 
  • He will give you the grace to hold your head up high. No shame. No guilt. Just freedom. 

Choose today to live in the freedom of his grace. He is kind. He is redeeming your past for his glory and your good! Now go and pass on his grace to someone who needs it! 

Em ❤️